you scratch the carpet with your big toe
when we are sitting in the living room playing Mario Kart
i am Birdo.
you are Yoshi.
while i am winning
you tell me about an article
you read on the internet yesterday.
a performance artist from Taiwan cut off his penis
and held a contest
where the winners would get to cook and eat it.
he did it to “raise awareness”
that’s your creative way of cheating
and this is my main complaint about you.